Well, Singapore has been promoting the use of the Chinese language, the slogan is "Hua Yu COOL". I gotta adopt that now. Well, as I ALWAYS said, my chinese is really not that bad. I can somewhat read at least half the chinese words, and I can speak. Of course, it is a different ball game altogether when your clients are Taiwanese. The Lord has "promoted" me recently to take over one of the Taiwan portfolio. I am grateful, but am filled with apprehensions at the same time. It is no joke having to deal with savvy, sophisticated clientele.
In the course of God unfolding His plans for me, there are MANY MANY times I want to throw in the towel and take the easier route. Doubts, disappointments, apprehensions, uncertainties are a bunch of discouragements. I remember Julian asked me once, whether I really wanna do this (succeeding in the world as salt and light and example that christians are heads, not tails). He asked if I want to be "not normal", not mediocre. I remember answering him: I have NO choice, I cannot be mediocre. Be it my upbringing, my family background, my exposure, how I am wired up - yea, blame it on all these reasons - I guess I am made for BIG things. I believe the Lord has already inscribed my life journey in the palm of His Hand even before I was formed in my mother's womb. This fact is humbling, for who am I that He should create me for greatness.
Throughout the past 4 months, I often remind myself of what one of my dear brothers shared with me as my "birthday gift": Humility. Success should not bring about pride, but it should bring about even more humility. I don't know how I am where I am today - it's ONLY by His Grace. For the 1st time, after reading a book, I realized why Peter told Jesus, "Away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man." He said this after he caught many fish when Jesus asked them to let down their nets. Story is that they have been fishing the entire night but did not catch any fish (even as professional fishermen). When they did what Jesus asked them to, they harvested aplenty. Success humbled him. I guess that is what you call character.
I realized that in life, it is very important for us to ALWAYS get ourselves in perspectives. So many things happen in our lives that can throw us in a frenzy. It is only when we step back from all the entanglement and once again return to our right perspectives, to focus on what's truly important, that we maintain our sanity,
I thank God He is in me, cos He always points me to Him, my True North.
I asked Him one night, "Lord, how is it possible I still love You so much and find You so novel and fresh after 10 years? I don't know how I am going to sustain through another 50 years." And I looked into the bible and there He was: "Even to your old age and gray hairs, I am he, I am he who will sustain you; I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you." Once again, I met Him....
I will CHOOSE to press on.... Remind me when I feel like giving up...